Pools of Grief
Life’s challenges can be overwhelming; everyone deserves a space to feel heard and supported. At Roamers Therapy, we provide trauma-informed, culturally sensitive, LGBTQIA+ affirming, and evidence-based environments to help you heal, grow, and navigate your mental well-being journey. As your psychotherapist, we are here to guide you every step of the way.
Find the Best Therapist in Chicago for Navigating Grief
Grief is a powerful and complex emotion. It is a deep and intense sense of sorrow and is typically associated with loss. Though often associated with death, grief can be associated with many losses, including:
- Trauma
- Breakups
- Sickness
- Infertility
- Termination
Stages of Grief
Kübler-Ross believed grief occurs in stages and developed the Five Stages of Grief. The Five Stages of Grief include:
- Denial (e.g., feeling numb or acting as if nothing happened)
- Anger (e.g., experiencing anger, aggression, or madness at a situation)
- Bargaining (e.g., contemplating what they could’ve done differently)
- Depression (e.g., intense sadness due to the situation)
- Acceptance (e.g., pain eases and begins to accept loss).
Pools of Grief
Pools of Grief is an analogy that uses bodies of water to illustrate how people might experience grief, sadness, and pain. The analogy is subjective because grief is subjective. Not everyone will experience or respond to grief the same way. Some people have lakes of grief, while others have oceans and seas.
Grief is Subjective
Grief affects people differently. People typically do not respond to grief in the same way. Oftentimes, people’s grief may get downplayed or invalidated because other people’s grief is worse. WHile it is true that other people have harder experiences than us, it is also true that other people have it easier than us. Some people will have larger pools of grief, whereas others might have smaller ones.
Grief is Subjective
Just because someone’s grief seems larger or more intense than yours does not mean that your grief does not exist. Similarly, just because your grief appears more difficult than someone else’s, it does not mean your grief does not exist. Multiple realities can coexist, and all grief is valid.
Invalidating Grief
When we invalidate grief (whether it’s our own or someone else’s), it leads to difficult problems, which include:
- More intense grief
- Anxiety, Depression, Trauma
- Hopelessness
- Loneliness
- Health complications
Invalidating grief also makes it less likely that we will seek help when needed.
How to Validate Grief
Here are some ways to validate someone’s grief (even your own):
- Listen to the person
- Journal about it or reflect
- Show compassion
- Empathize Validate emotions
- Hold space
- Practice self-care
- Practice self- and co-regulation techniques
At Roamers Therapy, our psychotherapists are here to support you through anxiety, depression, trauma and relationship issues, race-ethnicity issues, LGBTQIA+ issues, ADHD, Autism, or any challenges you encounter. Our psychotherapists are trained in Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, Dialectical Behavioral Therapy, Psychodynamic Therapy, Acceptance, and Commitment Therapy, Person-Centered Therapy, and Gottman Therapy.
Whether you’re seeking guidance on a specific issue or need help navigating difficult emotions, we’re ready to assist you every step of the way.
Contact us today to learn more about our services and schedule a session with our mental health professionals to begin your healing journey. To get started with therapy, visit our booking page.
First, decide if you’ll be paying out-of-pocket or using insurance. If you’re a self-pay client, you can book directly through the “Book Now” page or fill out the “Self-Pay/Out-of-network Inquiry Form.” If you’re using insurance, fill out the “Insurance Verification Form” to receive details about your costs and availability. Please let us know your preferred therapist. If your preferred therapist isn’t available, you can join the waitlist by emailing us. Once your appointment is confirmed, you’ll receive intake documents to complete before your first session.
This page is also part of the Roamers Therapy Glossary; a collection of mental-health related definitions that are written by our therapists.
While our offices are currently located at the South Loop neighborhood of Downtown Chicago, Illinois, we also welcome and serve clients for online therapy from anywhere in Illinois and Washington, D.C. Clients from the Chicagoland area may choose in-office or online therapy and usually commute from surrounding areas such as River North, West Loop, Gold Coast, Old Town, Lincoln Park, Lake View, Rogers Park, Logan Square, Pilsen, Bridgeport, Little Village, Bronzeville, South Shore, Hyde Park, Back of the Yards, Wicker Park, Bucktown and many more. You can visit our contact page to access detailed information on our office location.