What is congruence?
Congruence is the feeling of contentment when the person we are “matches up” with who we want to be. In other words, our thoughts, behaviors, and emotions align. For example, if you work at a job that you love, it may make you feel fulfilled. Or if you begin to prioritize yourself and your wellbeing, you may find that you are happier and have more energy. Congruence is something we constantly strive to accomplish as we like our thoughts and behaviors to be consistent with one another. According to Carl Rogers, self-actualization is the life-long process of fostering congruence in all aspects of our life.
How does congruence/incongruence affect me?
When we reach congruence, we tend to feel happier and more fulfilled out of life. We tend to appreciate our relationships better, have healthier boundaries, and have more enjoyment in multiple aspects of our lives. However, the opposite is true when we have incongruence. Incongruence is when our ideal self and self-image don’t match up. In other words, our thoughts and behaviors do not align. For example, if you work at a job that you hate, you feel unaccomplished. Incongruence causes a feeling known as dissonance which can ultimately lead to anxiety, depression, and other problems.
Find the Best Therapist in Chicago to Work Towards Being Congruent
As humans, we like to be consistent. We thrive in situations when our thoughts and behaviors align. It can be challenging to get to a point of congruence. However, there are a few things you can do to get to this place. First, it’s important to recognize what your core values are and how your actions (no matter how small) align with these values. It may help to journal each day what you did that was either congruent or incongruent with these values. Second, once you identify areas of incongruence, develop goals and a plan to reach congruence. If you have a therapist, they can help you set goals to work towards being congruent.
At Roamers Therapy, our psychotherapists are here to support you through anxiety, depression, trauma, and relationship issues, race-ethnicity issues, LGBTQIA+ issues, ADHD, Autism, or any challenges you encounter. Our psychotherapists are trained in Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, Dialectical Behavioral Therapy, Psychodynamic Therapy, Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, Person-Centered Therapy, and Gottman Therapy.
Whether you’re seeking guidance on a specific issue or need help navigating difficult emotions, we’re ready to assist you every step of the way.
Contact us today to learn more about our services and schedule a session with our mental health professionals to begin your healing journey. To get started with therapy, you can fill out our inquiry form. You may use this form whether you plan to use insurance benefits, self-pay, or out-of-network benefits, and to receive details about your out-of-pocket costs and our therapists’ availability. Once your appointment is confirmed, you’ll receive intake documents to complete before your first session.
This page is also part of the Roamers Therapy Glossary; a collection of mental-health-related definitions that are written by our therapists.
While our offices are currently located at the South Loop neighborhood of Downtown Chicago and Lakeview on Chicago’s North Side, Illinois, we also welcome and serve clients for online therapy from anywhere in Illinois and Washington, D.C. Clients from the Chicagoland area may choose in-office or online therapy and usually commute from surrounding areas such as River North, West Loop, Gold Coast, Old Town, Lincoln Park, Rogers Park, Logan Square, Pilsen, Bridgeport, Little Village, Bronzeville, South Shore, Hyde Park, Back of the Yards, Wicker Park, Bucktown and many more. You can visit our contact page to access detailed information on our office location.