Setting Boundaries with Therapists
Life’s challenges can be overwhelming; everyone deserves a space to feel heard and supported. At Roamers Therapy, we provide trauma-informed, culturally sensitive, LGBTQIA+ affirming, and evidence-based environments to help you heal, grow, and navigate your mental well-being journey. As your psychotherapist, we are here to guide you every step of the way.
Find the Best Therapist in Chicago to Learn Setting Boundaries
Boundaries are personal limits we set for ourselves. Boundaries are a form of self-care. They are rules or guidelines we set for ourselves for how we would like to be treated. When we often think about boundaries, we may think about limits we set for harmful or toxic relationships. However, boundaries are helpful in all relationships. In fact, the healthiest relationships have boundaries.
Boundaries in Therapy
Though therapy is a professional setting, the therapeutic relationship is a social relationship; your therapeutic relationship has boundaries. Your therapist may set certain boundaries to ensure that the therapeutic relationship is healthy and productive. Examples of boundaries a therapist might set include:
- They may not disclose personal information.
- They have policies on scheduling and rescheduling.
- They may have policies on communication outside of the session.
- They may not accept gifts from clients.
Boundaries in Therapy
Your therapist, however, is not the only person who is entitled to set boundaries in the therapeutic relationship.
You may also choose (and need) to set boundaries with your therapist. Common boundaries clients set with therapists include:
- Requesting therapists do not self-disclose personal information.
- Requesting that therapists start and end sessions on time.
- Requesting that therapists do not touch on certain topics.
- Requesting that therapists do not use certain techniques or approaches.
Setting Boundaries in Therapy
Setting boundaries with your therapist is healthy and can be very beneficial. When you set boundaries with your therapist, you build trust and a stronger bond with them. Additionally, setting boundaries with your therapist is a way to practice setting boundaries in your everyday relationships. Though this might be scary, therapists often want to learn ways to make the therapeutic process better for you.
Setting Boundaries in Therapy
Here are some examples of how to set boundaries in therapy:
- I am glad you feel comfortable sharing your personal experiences with me, but the more you share about yourself, the less I feel the session is about me.
- I understand things come, but when you are consistently late, it makes me feel like my time is not important to you. Do you think we can start on time more frequently?
- This topic feels triggering today. Do you think we can put this on hold until I have had more time to process it?
- I felt judged by some of the language you recently used. Can you think of neutral language to use next time?
When Therapists Do Not Respect our Boundaries
Therapists are people first, which means they will often get “it” wrong. Therapists may forget the boundaries you set or may be slow to change. If your therapist is consistently forgetting your boundaries, there are a few things you can do:
- Restate your boundaries. Letting your therapist know that they have not been respecting your boundaries is vulnerable. This is helpful feedback for them to have.
- Reflect on the relationship. Sometimes, a therapist’s style does not mesh with our boundaries. This is okay! If the relationship is not benefitting you, you can always seek a different approach.
Takeaways
- Boundaries are limits we set for ourselves in relationships. The healthiest relationships have boundaries.
- Boundaries in therapy make therapy better.
- You and your therapist are entitled to set boundaries.
- When you set boundaries with your therapist, you can build trust and a stronger bond.
- If your therapist does not respect your boundaries, you can always seek a different approach.
At Roamers Therapy, our psychotherapists are here to support you through anxiety, depression, trauma and relationship issues, race-ethnicity issues, LGBTQIA+ issues, ADHD, Autism, or any challenges you encounter. Our psychotherapists are trained in Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, Dialectical Behavioral Therapy, Psychodynamic Therapy, Acceptance, and Commitment Therapy, Person-Centered Therapy, and Gottman Therapy.
Whether you’re seeking guidance on a specific issue or need help navigating difficult emotions, we’re ready to assist you every step of the way.
Contact us today to learn more about our services and schedule a session with our mental health professionals to begin your healing journey. To get started with therapy, visit our booking page.
First, decide if you’ll be paying out-of-pocket or using insurance. If you’re a self-pay client, you can book directly through the “Book Now” page or fill out the “Self-Pay/Out-of-network Inquiry Form.” If you’re using insurance, fill out the “Insurance Verification Form” to receive details about your costs and availability. Please let us know your preferred therapist. If your preferred therapist isn’t available, you can join the waitlist by emailing us. Once your appointment is confirmed, you’ll receive intake documents to complete before your first session.
This page is also part of the Roamers Therapy Glossary; a collection of mental-health related definitions that are written by our therapists.
While our offices are currently located at the South Loop neighborhood of Downtown Chicago, Illinois, we also welcome and serve clients for online therapy from anywhere in Illinois and Washington, D.C. Clients from the Chicagoland area may choose in-office or online therapy and usually commute from surrounding areas such as River North, West Loop, Gold Coast, Old Town, Lincoln Park, Lake View, Rogers Park, Logan Square, Pilsen, Bridgeport, Little Village, Bronzeville, South Shore, Hyde Park, Back of the Yards, Wicker Park, Bucktown and many more. You can visit our contact page to access detailed information on our office location.